Today, January 11, 2015 marks 6 months since my release from a Behavioral Hospital for an attempted suicide. I’m proud to call myself a survivor. For years I’ve suffered from Panic Attacks that would last for up to 20 minutes, feeling so dark and down that I felt cutting my wrists was the only way for me to feel something other than…well….nothing. I felt hallow and empty. Like there was nothing in the world that could save me. Absolutely nothing. I ate maybe 1 meal a day, slept for 12 hours, barely talked to anyone about how I felt inside. Instead I kept it hidden. Kept it inside. I let my Depression get the best of me. I hid behind a bright smile, and sarcastic humor, drowned my feelings in anything I could really get my hands on. I look back on myself back then and I cannot believe that I was so broken. It’s a miracle I was even able to put myself back together. With the help of my family and friends…I’m not completely whole again I admit, but I’m 1 step closer to happiness.
P.S if you know or feel someone you know is suffering from anxiety or depression, do not let it go. Please help them get help. It really is a terrible and heart wrenching disease to get through, and they can’t do it alone.