It is 2:30 in the morning and I have homework due tomorrow, so naturally, I’m up blogging in order to procrastinate as much as humanly possible. Any who, today I want to talk about everything that’s wrong with me…
For starters I twitch. You know that little twitch people do sometimes when they’re cold? Yea, I do that, only mine happens all the time. I often get weird looks from people who aren’t used to it, for those who are they for the most part ignore it, or try to. I guess I could be wrong, but i’m pretty sure its not torrets. I’ve naturally swarmed to the internet for answers. There are several possible reasons, ranging from calcium deficiency to problems with my nervous system.
If that’s not enough to be wrong with one person I also have blackouts. To put it simply everything around me goes black and I feel really dizzy, sometimes to the point to where I can’t stand up, it generally passes in less than a minute. I believe its because I don’t eat very well. Often I forget to eat or don’t get hungry for long periods of time (i’ve been without food for more than two days a few times). I’m not anerexic, I am okay with my weight and I don’t have body image issues for the record. And when I do get hungry I can eat a lot. I know it’s unhealthy and I try to remind myself to eat even when i’m not hungry. It doesn’t help that almost everyone in my family has either diabetes or some sort of blood sugar problem.
Although not as often sometimes i get an excruciating pain in my stomach. It hurts so bad I can’t even bear standing up, it feels mildly like someones stabbing me. Its only happened 3 or 4 times but all have been in the past 2 years. It’s usually gone within 10 minutes at least. Pretty sure that’s cuz I don’t eat too…
Although i’m not sure its a malfunction I suppose it is a bit odd…I think about my death a lot. I don’t want to die anytime soon I fear death, but I think a lot about how I want to die or what my funeral would be like. Not in a suicidal way, I don’t want to die soon, I just like to think about how it would happen.
Hope you gained perspective into my life, share your odd “malfunctions” with me!